If I Break (If I Break, #1) by Portia Moore

 

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Rating: 4 stars

Genre: Contemporary Romance

This book had me feeling rather conflictingly towards my liking for it at different intervals of the story. However I started to find it much more appealing as my reading journey progress so it was a pleasant book overall.

This story is about a woman, Lauren, and her plight to save her marriage under all circumstances from ending in scatters with her husband,Cal, whom she loves irrevocably. She deals with it in the same way most individuals deal with dire situations; by acting on impulse in fits of anger. As unhealthy as that sounds to her it was just a way of gaining her husband’s attention. She’s tired of constantly dealing with his disappearances without as much of an explanation of where exactly he’s going and that leaves her wondering about the things he is keeping from her. Will she find out in time to save her marriage from the pits of destruction she so desperately wants to avoid?

I must admit that I wasn’t exactly the biggest fan of Lauren during the beginning parts of this story. I tend to feel overly strong about female character portrayals, whether they represent the typical woman persona or whether they are given a unique quality to their personality. At first Lauren to me seemed more similar to the typical portrayal will really left me feeling a little unsure of my agreement of the whole marriage concept. It seemed as if all she believed in was using arguments as a form of defence and throwing out alleged accusations of suspicion and cheating towards her husband. To me she was the one who should doubt her love for the fact that she could not trust her husband enough to know he loves her. I don’t know may be it is just be but marriage isn’t just any small commitment and I’m not saying she should have turned out to be the ‘my husband can do whatever the hell he wants’ wife but she lacked the support towards him. She knew from the very beginning that he won’t be around much so her behaviour didn’t really sit too well with me. BUT all that seemed to change after delving deeper in to the story, I in fact found myself sympathising with Lauren and her situation. I began understanding the cause of her issues, why she would feel that way and the extents to which she would go for the man who she shares her life with.
One thing Portia Moore does greatly is using her style of writing as a form of causing emotion to stir within the reader. Yes, I do tend to be a very emotional reader in general, but I always appreciate good writing techniques that can make you feel without over doing it. Her words capture you in the moment and fill you with understanding of Lauren’s character, and how hard she is struggling to come to terms with everything.

I try to keep my reviews as spoiler free as absolute possible because I would hate to ruin the whole book experience for any reader but I must warn you that the story does take a turn which you will not be expecting whatsoever, but which makes it all the more compelling. I was so sure I had all the reasons and conclusions mapped out but the final disclosure was nothing like I could have anticipated! You will be left reeling thinking “wtf just happened?” I love cliff hangers as much as I tend to hate them. And the one experienced in this story is so different to the usual stories I have come across. It’s made the whole book experience all the more enjoyable for me and I can say for certain that I cannot wait to get my hands onto the second part in this story, it’s impossible not to want to carry on!

I conclude with a beautiful quote from the book:

Someone once told me when you’re in love; your heart takes over and your brain shuts off. I never understood what that meant when I was younger, but I do now. New love makes you look past people’s mistakes, which seem magnified later on.

Click here to purchase this on Amazon (UK link)

Click here to purchase this on Amazon (US link)

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